Today, one of my seniors told me that I made her cry. It was one of the best moments of my year.
Now, before you think me a complete and utterly heartless jerk, let me give yo a little more of the story. Last Friday, as each class of seniors walked out my door, I handed each young person a copy of a poem I wrote last year as part of our spoken word study. I posted the poem here last week. When the student told me she cried a little, it was a good thing, not because she was made sad by what I wrote, but because that told me she got what I was trying to say, which was, in part, that some of these kids are truly special, and I am proud to have shared these halls and these walls with them for a brief time before they exit and begin their quests toward their individual greatnesses. I always enjoy working with seniors, and each year they surprise me and amaze me, while at the same time frustrating me to no end in a way that only those on the precipice of adulthood and yet still sheltered in the cocoon of adolescence can do. This year is a little different, however. You see, this year, my daughter Emily is graduating. I have been trying for weeks to figure out just how to put into words what is going through my head, filtered through my heart, as my little girl prepares to cross the stage and receive her Buhler High School diploma. It is not an easy thing for me to do. For some of you, this may seem odd, seeing as I tend to ramble on at times and let whatever thoughts might be stewing simply gush forth. As I said, this is different. So, here we go; a true Rambling.
Emily was born shortly after 11:30 pm. After we met her, and I was given the chance to give her her first bath, and Heidi and Emily were quiet and sleeping, I had to slip away and write lesson plans and take them up to my classroom. We had rushed to Southwest Medical Center shortly after midnight that morning, and I while patiently waited through an endless loop of Andy Griffith reruns, Emily made sure that we knew she was going to do things her way from the very beginning. She wasn't rude about it, but she just quietly waited, seemingly ignoring what was going on around her, literally around her, as Heidi strained and cried through over 23 hours of labor. Emily had apparently decided she would join us when she was ready. But I digress.
At around 4 am I made my way to Liberal High School and put my plans on my desk, went back to our apartment for an hour or two, and then returned to the hospital. I went to Heidi's room, where I found her sleeping, but no Emily. I went to the nursery. No Emily. That is a little frightening. I found her, in her bassinette, in the nurse's lounge. The nurse told me she took her in so the other nurses could see just how perfect she was. I believed her, and I had proof right there.
Now, what is the point of this little stumble through the past? Well, that perfect little girl is still perfect. Does she meet some standard laid out by Cosmo or MTV or other society measuring stick? I don't know, and she doesn't care. You see, she is still doing it her way, just doing what she knows is right amidst all the commotion around her. Sure, she sheds tears (a lot sometimes), and life frustrates her at times. However, she is growing up, from that tiny little picture of perfection, into her own young woman who is uniquely her. And I am proud of her for that. I could recount story after story to show you just how special she is to me, from the times in the neighborhood pool in Liberal to the time I learned she was afraid of heights when she crawled up the bleachers on her hands and knees to the advice about giving the "crazy eye" to the girl who picked on her in the lunch line to the driving lesson that ended in the yard at the end of the block to the excitement she showed when she discovered art classes at BHS to glowing smile she had when Mrs. Dewitt announced at the awards banquet that she had won a scholarship for her passion for art. The other day in the hallway, I was walking and talking to a football coach from Garden City Community College when Emily strolled up, held her arms out wide, and gave me the warmest of hugs before continuing down the corridor. The coach seemed a bit perplexed, but he chuckled a little when I said, "That is my daughter by the way, in case you were wondering."
When Emily was a freshman, Mrs. Susan Jordan told me that little girls need dads. The truth is, this dad needs his little girl too. The last 18 plus years have been a blessing, and the last four years have been a treasure. Thank you, Emily. And congratulations. You are still perfect, and you are still keep doing it your way.