I Am a Nerd

Hello, my name is Jason, and I (deep breath, collect myself, find my center, my safe place, and push on) am a nerd. There, I said it. Well, I typed it. Now, I do understand that for those who know me, this is not news. However, this about me, not you, so shut up. I am trying to make a breakthrough here. 

All right, that was a little out of line, a little extreme. Sorry. 

I am nerd though. I had this discussion with my dear wife this evening. She argued that I am not a nerd, but I think she just does not want to admit that she married a huge, helplessly nerdy nerd. But she did, and there is nothing she can do about it now. I fooled her long enough to pull her in, and now, she will just have to live with it. Wife of a nerd. It seems like a cruel thing to do to someone you love, but when a nerd manages to marry a pretty lady, he is not going to let it go. 

The evidence is overwhelming. 

Exhibit 1: I am writing a blog. For free. Just for fun.

Exhibit 2: I spent my lunch time today discussing wha we should put on our ELA Team Grammar T-shirts. I have no idea if anyone outside of that room would grasp why any of the numerous suggestions were funny, but we were laughing.

Exhibit 2A: I seek out these people to discuss puns, satire, irony, and archetypes. Sorry folks, but you are nerds too. Check the bulletin board for the next meeting. 

Exhibit 3: I had to hurry to make it to my 5th hour class because I was staring at a projecotr screen, counting out iambic pentameter in lines that appeared on the screen. The rhythm was fairly inconsistent, but with some simple inversion of word order, it could be close.

Exhibit 4: When Ms. Porter quotes a Facebook post, saying "I stopped reading your status update after the third grammatical error", I will admit that I shared that post on my timeline.

Exhibit 5: When I overhear Mrs. Williams next door talking to her AP class about George Bernard Shaw, I think fondly back to one of my favorite college classes The Plays of G.B. Shaw.

Exhibit 6: In Beetlejuice, when the ghosts go to the afterlife and there is a NO EXIT sgin above the door behind them, I actually understand the allusion, and I really like the play.

Exhibit 7: I know what an allusion is.

Exhibit 8: I lost my seniors about two minutes into an analysis of Jay-Z's verse in "No Church in the Wild", but I think I pulled a few of them back when we pulled Socrates and Jesus into the discussion. 

Exhibit 9: I took part in a discussion of preferences regarding use of computer or paper and pencil for writing poetry versus expository pieces. 

Exhibit 10: I know what a gerund is.

Exhibit 11: I can rattle off the Personal Pronoun Case charts. Don't hate.

Exhibit 12: When I watch a film such as The Departed, I cannot help but examine if Billy or Colin should be considered tragic heroes, in a classic sense.

Do I have to go further? 

However, I am not ashamed. I am willing to embrace my status as a nerd. I have been one all of my life, after all.  And we are many. I was driving home yesterday, and CBS Sports Radio had an interview with Eddie George, the former NFL running back. He was a six time All-Pro and won the Heisman Trophy at Ohio State. Stud. After retiring from the NFL, George struggled to adjust to his new lifestyle. He battled through and found a new outlet. What is he doing now? He is performing Shakespeare, filling the roles of Julius Caesar and Othello. NFL Superstar. College Football Legend. Nerd. 

So embrace your true selves, all you nerds out there. You should be proud. I know I am.