You might be asking, "Well now, what exactly is a guilty pleasure?" I am glad you asked. Guilty pleasures are those experiences or moments from which one draw enjoyment or, as the phrase would indicate, pleasure, of some kind; however, it becomes obvious that one should not feel good about enjoying this. Hence the guilty aspect of "guilty pleasure". These guilty pleasures do not include such moments as sitting on the patio in the evening enjoying a moment of peace that Kansas has to offer, not does it refer to an hour spent doing nothing but sitting on the couch with a loved one pulled close. These times may not be truly "productive" in an entirely practical sense, but there is no need to question whether one should feel good about enjoying them. Nope, those at guiltless. I am not encompassing in this category such happenings as when an upperclassman saunters down to a power rack populated by freshmen so he can break wind. True, this one of those times when males laugh heartily if no ladies are around, but truly, this is not a guilty pleasure; it is just being a jerk. "Ok," you are saying to yourself. "You have eliminated what is not a guilty pleasure, but what is?" Well, I will tell you.
One of my guilty pleasures is enjoying music which I really should not enjoy. I don't mean listening to Eminem or Jay-Z. Not Metallica, The Doors, or Nirvana. Not even Katy Perry or Ludacris. Nope. I can point out and argue value in listening to that music, most music in fact. No guilt in enjoying that. This is a category of music that is just, well, wrong. It is either simply vapid, somewhat inappropriate, or downright icky. For example, I drove home today and was forced to turn the stereo up, way up, because a little tune titled "Baby Got Back" had rotated into the playlist. Even worse, I can still lay down every line, spit every verse. And I enjoy it. Guilty pleasure. "Turn Down for What?" is on the list. Really, anything featuring Lil Jon. Yea-ah. Or a certain song by Nickleback. There is no way I can feel good about enjoying these tunes. But I do.
What else? Certain movies. Sure, I stop if Caddyshack, Animal House, Vacation, or Blues Brothers come on. What person with a soul doesn't? Those are classics. However, I also have paused to view more than a little bit of Dumb and Dumber and Napoleon Dynamite. Multiple times. Each. I feel a little worse about myself afterward each time, and yet I enjoy it at the time.
My guilty pleasures go beyond entertainment though. Food is a significant area in which I find pleasure and enjoyment, only to wonder, "What the heck, Kohls?" afterward. For example, I have a horrible habit of taking Doritos, or whatever they call the Kroger version of said snack chip (more on that later), and piling them in a bowl. "Don't beat yourself. Everyone eats chips," you say. I am not done yet. I pour copious amounts of hot sauce on the chips. And then I pile on handfuls of cheese. I microwave the entire mountain of nutritional heresy, and then I consume it. It is awful, really. Some of the cheese burns. There is always a puddle of hot sauce in the bottom of the bowl that has to be scooped up with soggy chips. For some reason, I enjoy this culinary atrocity, and if we have chips and cheese in the house, I will probably eat it tonight. Afterward, I regret what I have done. Then I lick the bowl and scrape the last bit of burn cheese out before putting the dish in the washer.
I think another action I have taken involving Doritos could fall under guilty pleasure. When my son and daughter were both rather young, we went to the store to buy groceries. I will admit that at the time, I convinced my kids that the Kroger brand chips are the "real thing" and that Doritos are actually the imitation version. I doubt either one still believes it, but I take pleasure in the fact that my offspring referred to store brand, less expensive chips as "the good ones" whenever we picked up chips, and I do not think they have ever actually had a bag of the "other kind". But I feel a little guilty too.
Or maybe not.
No comments:
Post a Comment